Listening For Success

As a college undergraduate student, my experience in the workplace has been relatively limited in comparison to employees and professionals with many years of experience. Therefore, the majority of experiences I encounter may only come from the classroom setting. Keeping this thought in my mind, I realize that although the content of this blog is meant to pertain to anyone in the professional setting, it is missing a very important audience, COLLEGE STUDENTS! As a result of this realization, I have spent this week looking for material that pertains to EVERYONE.  In this event, the content of today's post is referenced from material that I have learned in my other Communications courses throughout the school year. I will talk about a skill that everyone needs in any area of their life to be an effective communicator-LISTENING.

No matter who we are or what we do, listening is essential in any function of life when we must work with others. We must learn to avoid the internal and external distractions that hinder our ability to interpret a message, while learning to communicate in response to the message. Here are a few strategies that can be used for more effective listening.

1). Paraphrasing:

By stating the message we have received within our own words, we demonstrate that we are paraphrasing the message to better fit our own understanding. We are responding to both verbal and nonverbal signals that are given by the speaker. By taking the main points of what is said and putting them into a context that fits our understanding, we can fight daydreaming, stay on track, and remove any emotional issues that separate us from effective communication. In a variety of different conversations whether they have been in class or between my friends, I always find myself selecting the main points of a conversation and confirming what has been said with the speaker. By doing this, I feel that I am able to not only put the words into context for my understanding, but I can avoid any distractions that disrupt my thought process.

2). Expressing Understanding

In many situations it is of more importance to not only be able to comprehend the message that is being received, but to understand the speaker's feelings and how they affect the message. In this situation, we express understanding, meaning that we are able to assess the speaker's feelings more accurately and respond to them. At many times in past experiences whether on the job or with my friends, I have at times focused too hard on  what is being said rather than understanding how the speaker feels as a result of it. Because of this, I have responded in ways that do not correlate with what has been said. Although it is important to understand the message, the speaker's feelings and concerns should always be the most important part of any conversation when communicating.

3). Asking Questions

As an extension of paraphrasing and expressing our understanding, it is important that we also learn to ask questions to help us gain a more in depth perspective of what is being said . Because we are not necessarily taught how to ask questions, we are often given a challenge of what types of questions are appropriate to ask in certain situations. In my past, I can recall many times where I have misunderstood a message that the speaker has given. To better understand what was spoken, I debated with myself many times whether the questions I wanted to ask were appropriate to the situation or to the individual's privacy. Therefore, appropriate questioning should be used to clarify a person's perspective, while opening up discussion on a previous idea.

4). Using Verbal/Non-Verbal Communication

While it is important to be able to comprehend what is being said, effective listening also requires making use of nonverbal gestures. Many of these gestures include: eye contact, nodding our heads, and sitting in an attentive manner to show that we are listening and interested. In the majority of the conversations I have, I always try to implement these nonverbal gestures to show the listener that I care about the content of what they are saying and understand their point of view. Despite our opinions of the content of what is spoken, it is important that we use nonverbal gestures in our conversations in order to show others we are giving them our full attention, and care about what they have to say.


No matter what we do in life, everyone must learn how to listen and work collaboratively with others. If we are not able to effectively listen to what is being said, we not only miss out on what is being said, but we have the potentiality of showing others that we do not care about what they have to say, or we are not interested. Therefore, it is crucial that we use various listening skills to our advantage. If we do this, we not only benefit ourselves, but we are better able to manage and maintain relationships with our co-workers and our friends.


(photo courtesy of http://blog.complete.com)

Harris, Thomas E. (2011). Small Group and Team Communication. Boston, MA. Pearson Education, Inc.